I’ve fell off the wagon and deep back into addiction. It was at it’s worst about 3 years ago but i gave it up and my condition steadily improved but recently i’ve found myself plummeting back into the downward spiral and never ending joy of………
According to friends i use the word “fuck” way too much in every day life.
Examples i’ve been given…
A. “That’s fucking amazing!”
B. “What the fuck was that all about?”
C. “Did youfucking see that?!
D. “I’mfucked, man.”
E. “Fuckin‘ hell!” F(uck).
G. “Fuuuuuuuuuuuck!”
Obviously i use other swear words but apparently “fuck” and it’s various usages are my favourite. So here’s a fucking Monday List with a twist. Well make that two Monday Lists for the price of one. I had so much fucking fun making up a List with “fuck” in the song title that i thought i’d make another one up with swear words/insults in the bands name.
I thinking swearing is maybe a Scottish trait and is in our blood. We don’t mean any harm or offence by it. It’s just crept it’s way into out day to day language. We just fucking embrace it i suppose.
I fell back in love with being lazy. I supposed it was only a matter of time before we reconciled and what better time than the summer.
I spent the whole of this afternoon lying in the park with a farmers daughter (*) and some friends listening to some brilliant albums (on what was the best plug in and play speakers i’ve heard so far) and talking about general nonsense. It was an idyllic afternoon by anyone’s standards but one that was especially nice for me. I’ve been needing a day like today for ages.
I had two options when i woke this morning. Go through to Luss for a day out with Morgan and her family/friends or go to the La Fete De La Musique in the west ends Ashton Lane. The annual Glasgow West End festival kicked off on the 7 June and i’ve been lucky enough to take in a few bits of it so far and to be honest the music festival did sound appealing but i declined both in favour of lying on the grass and cloud watching. Luckily i convinced Simon and his on/off partner to join me in lazing around all afternoon, well at least until 7pm. That’s when they went along to Ashton Lane to join in the festivities. To be fair Simon does know a few of the DJs playing it so it’s understandable that he should go along. Me? I lay in the park for another half hour before the munchies kicked in and i made my way through the gardens and back to the flat. The sun was still splitting the trees. I love summer.
When i got back i made some pancakes and smothered them in nutella then polished off the bitesize jammy dodgers i bought on the way home.
As for now? Well i’m doing this post, gonna roll a few more smokes then i need to decide whether or not i should go to a party tonight. I’ve been invited to a house party that is literally 5 minutes round the corner from me. But i only know 3 people out of the apparent 77 who are going so i’ll either need to get really drunk and chatty or just do the usual and sit silently and get stoned and secretly plug my iPod into the sound system in without anyone knowing. Also according to Simon i’ll need to make an effort and dress nice as there will be plenty of “talent” there. Eh, no thanks man, i’ll stick to the tramp look. The world’s an ugly place so let’s keep it that way.
Here’s some tunes that we listened to in the park this afternoon….
Of all the things we had a stoned talk about in the park today there was one strange subject that kept everybody amused….Google. Google and the hours of endless fun it can give you. I don’t mean the fun that you can have by browsing endlessly all day. No, i mean the amount of “Google Games” that everyone can play.
Example:-
A) Google your name and the word “needs” [i.e. JOHN needs]
B) Click search
C) Record the first 10 results
According to Google i need….
1. John needs 13 bottles of water from the store.
2. John needs father.
3. John needs charisma.
4. John needs a better wig.
5. John needs a better online ingredient.
6. John needs to tone down that profile.
7. John needs our help!
8. John needs to get his patootie back here.
9. John needs a job.
10. John needs an acoustic guitar.
Another game, which is one of my favourites is “Question Google”. Type in “why”, “what”, “when” or “who” then follow that with a “are” or “is” and any letter and be bewildered/amused by the amount of unbelievably strange suggestions that get fired at you.
WHY?
are Michael Jacksons kid white
are British people so ugly
are Americans so stupid
are adverts louder than programmes (i SO agree!)
are Jamaicans so fast
are Qwerty keyboards in that order
are men attracted to breasts
are Jews so successful
are x’s kisses
is there a dead pakistani on my couch
is belly button fluff blue (Whaaaaa? Who asked this? Someone from fucking Avatar?)
is Google racist
and last but not least, my personal favourite.
Why is water wet?
Well enough of this hazey tomfoolery. I’m off to listen to some Kyuss and make a decision on this party. On one hand it’ll be good to get out and meet new people but on the other hand i’m loving lounging in these combats and over sized tshirts with some weed and cans of Tennents. I’m scared that if i do go to this party it might be shite and ruin an erstwhile pretty glorious day. Yet again it might be the perfect ending to it. I’ll report in the morning.
S.I.T Wolf X
(*) Farmers daughter = a quarter of weed. Si enjoys making up slang. That’s one of his better ones.
After last Mondays top 10 animal related song titles we move swiftly on this week to the top 10 band names with animal references. There was a lot to choose from and in the future i may make another list of animal influenced band names. Picking 10 was quite hard as there are a lot of bands i like that somehow seem to have animals in their names. But here we go….
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Someones In The Wolf 