Wrong.
Attempts at Christmas singles in recent years have done my nut in no end. There’s the “cheeky” ones like The Darkness or Lady Gaga. Then there’s the “absolutely no point” ones like Bo Selecta or Kelly and Ozzy Osbourne. The “fuck off and die” ones from Cliff Richard or Gary Jules. And the downright offensiveness of Ricky Tomlinson and Peter Kay deciding it’d be fun to try and raise a laugh with a comedy Christmas song. Put emphasis on the word TRY there. Finally, of course there’s the reality TV cash cow corporation and the likes of Joe “Shiny White Teeth” McElderry and the rest of those fucking X-Factor ghouls. Complete dicks, the lot of them.
Anyway, i may be coming across as a Scrooge here. But i’m really not. I’m far from it. I DO enjoy Christmas. Very much in fact. I love spoiling people with presents and seeing their faces on Christmas Day when you KNOW they’re going to love what you’ve got them. And of course i do love a good festive feed. I mean what’s not to like about a good Christmas dinner with your annually drunken family?
Seriously though, whatever happened to a good old proper Christmas novelty single. I might just be being nostalgic here but i want another Mr Blobby.
I’d even rather listen to East 17 than some of the tripe that’s been dribbled out this past decade. Actually “Stay Another Day” is a bit of a guilty pleasure of mine if truth be told. Come on…..i was only 9 when it came out! The memories from then are untainted and happy. So much so that i still enjoy hearing those piano chords tinkle out of the stereo every Christmas day. That’s right even i get my cheese on at Christmas. And to be fair it was a proper Christmas single. It even had snow and big furry jackets in the video!
I remember getting stupidly excited back in 2007 when i found out Maps was recording a shoegaze style cover of it for Christmas.
He even showed a bit of festive comedy spirit when he posted the track for fans back then. If i remember it correctly it went like this….
“This Song is my special Xmas gift to you inspired by taking 12 E’s and running myself over in my own car. Only an enormous puffer jacket prevented me from certain death. Mappy Xmas, James.”
So, what’s happening this year Christmas single wise? Well, to be honest i don’t really know. There’ll probably be the usual X-Factor attempt, there’ll be the Facebook campaigns for some “wacky” one or one to fight the power or Simon Cowell as he’s better known (more on that in a minute) and there’ll be Cliff fucking Richard no doubt.
Who gets my vote? Well, i tipped them for big things at the beginning of the year and they’re set to end 2010 with their very own little Christmas single. It’s Hurts. I don’t grudge them it. It may be kinda cringe worthy but it is so in a good East 17 kinda way if you like and not like all those “artists” i verbally slaughtered at the top of the post. Technically and lyrically it’s almost an anti-Christmas song actually. But i like it nonetheless.
So here’s to Hurts for Christmas Number 1. Or should that be New Year number one?
MP3: Hurts – All I Want For Christmas Is New Year’s Day
You can watch the video on YouTube. No embedding allowed sadly.
Oh and the Facebook campaign i mentioned earlier….i don’t usually get involved with those and probably won’t again either this year but this one made me laugh. Silently. To myself.
Ok, Christmas songs rant over.
S.I.T Wolf X